LAWWWWWD it’s been awhile. (As usual.)
I didn’t feel so busy but (as usual) when I look back it has been quite eventful.
Nicole came the first week of 2014 and as usual it was tons of fun. We got to go to a few used book stores where I bought like five books for 35 dollars. We also got Janet to try on wedding dresses which was a lot of fun even if the sales lady disliked Nicole and I.
I also bought a toque which is kind of a big deal because I always eschewed hats with a firm hand and now I bought two and I actually wear them. 2014 is the year of hats for me. We got Nicole to play with necklaces and Janet actually bought a patterned shirt and wore it.
I also blinded Nicole, Janet and Diego with my Polaroid as I kept trying to take candids and use up all of my rainbow film. I actually prefer candids to posed photos. Even though you *can* end up looking like a gormless freak but it can yield some lovely shots.
One of my favourite parts of Nicole’s visit was when we all sat in Janet’s room and soul gazed into each other and predicted the future. There were a lot of really psychedelic vibes floating around that night. Also when I was looking at Nicole an image came to mind of her and some guy and it had actually already happened.
But all in all it was fun, it felt like we were thirteen and just predicting our glorious futures.
That week we also tried a new ramen place called Santouka that was amazing!!! Their broth was a lot better than Kenzo and I liked the sizing options a lot better.
Other than that it’s been a lot of work (ugh treat receipts!!) and just trying to save as much money as I can for my trip. I give myself 50 bucks a pop to spend for the week and I still have like 30 bucks left so yay me~
amoebas 4 lyf
Also I finished reading Gaiman’s The Ocean at the End of the Lane and I lovedlovedloved it!!!!

“Adults follow paths. Children explore. Adults are content to walk the same way, hundreds of times, or thousands; perhaps it never occurs to adults to step off the paths, to creep beneath rhododendrons, to find the spaces between fences.”

I came upon this quote that suddenly articulated clearly how I’ve felt for a very long time.
Even though I’m nearing 25 in my heart I always felt 14, 15, 16… and it use to confuse me. Would I always feel like this? It wasn’t just feeling “young at heart” or immature or childish… I just couldn’t feel like an adult no matter what. It didn’t matter if I paid my bills or did my taxes I always felt disconnected from people I know who really ARE adults.
So when I read this something in my clicked. All my adult friends are on a path. They’re sure of the path that they’re on. They don’t see a need to deviate from it. Whereas I, for awhile now wasn’t sure what path I wanted to be on. I still don’t… really although it’s getting clearer.
I guess those who aren’t sure of their path know how to seem like they’re together and not scared of the uncertainty of the future. During this time I worked, and went out and seemed fine but I was always really terrified inside that I’d get caught jumping the fence, trampling those rhododendrons as I shimmied through.
But now it’s getting a little better and I don’t think it’s so bad.

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